Emotions In Addiction Recovery
Happy, sad, grumpy, excited, nervous, giddy – these are all things we feel at one time or another and none of them are forever.  Despite the fact that emotions are transitory, we have this sense that they are permanent conditions and we end up spending a lot of time in variations on a negative, either:

• Feeling like we are stuck and that we won’t be able to ever get out of what we are currently feeling.
• Being upset because we can’t make a positive emotion last forever.

The first becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, the second is about accepting what is, being fully present in the moment and just being able to do that can help us feel a lot happier more often.

So, what can you do to address your emotional state in addiction recovery? What can you control? And how do you start to feel better? We review here, then we invite your questions about emotional issues in recovery at the end.

Cleaning Up The View
This is a version of a story I heard some years ago in a yoga class: an old man was living in a retirement home and was deeply unhappy. He felt that everything wonderful in the world, everything he loved doing had been lost to him because he was now infirm and spent all of his time alone in his room. He called his grandson to tell him how unhappy he was and ask that he be moved to a place that had more of those things that would make him happy.

His grandson came to visit and see what he could do to help his grandfather. When he arrived he found many people gathered together in the common room singing, playing cards and chatting. He saw that there were lovely courtyards and gardens surrounding the building with people enjoying the park like setting.

He went to his grandfather’s room and found him sitting alone, with the curtains drawn and dusty light filtering in. His grandfather said, “Look around here, it is terrible, dark, dingy and I am shut in here all alone all day”. His grandson went to the window and opened the curtains, he found an old towel and wiped the dust from the windowpanes and opened them to the garden outside. All of a sudden the room was filled with light, bird song and laughter from the people gathered on the lawn.

He wheeled his grandfather into the common room where he was welcomed. By the end of the day the grandfather was smiling and he thanked his grandson for the gift of the day. His grandson said,“It isn’t only today, these things are here everyday, you just have to open yourself to them”.

The moral, my yoga teacher said before ending the class was this: before you change what you are looking at, check what you are looking through.

Changing How We View The WorldThat lesson has stuck with me for a long time, and though it isn’t always easy to remember when you are deep into whatever you are feeling it certainly helps when you do think about it. When we are working to overcome an addiction, we all have a tendency to pronounce the status of the world based on how we feel, and to miss out on great moments because we know they won’t last and are afraid of losing them. But the truth is that no moment lasts forever and that by changing the experience of how we view the world we can also change the experience of how we are in the world.

An Exercise On Perspective
I like to give people this exercise to help with adjusting perceptions.

1. Record your emotional state hourly.
Beginning at 9 in the morning and ending at 8 that night, every hour on the hour stop what you are doing and write down what you are feeling. In between don’t think about how you feel, just go about the business of the day.

2. Review your entries.
The next day look back at your list and the twelve entries you made. Probably there are a few repeats, but probably they also change throughout the day.

3. Put it all into context.
Happiness may not last, but that does not mean it’s never coming back. Sadness, anger and fear also don’t last, especially if we realize that they don’t have to. What is true right now is only true for right now, and we always have a choice about what part of our experience we choose to engage with. Before we rush to change what ever it is that we think we are looking at we need to take the time to check what it is that we are looking through!

Beyond Rehabilitation: What To Expect From Someone In RecoveryThe addict has finished an inpatient program and is clean and sober. You have gone through the hard part and think that the worst is over. We will discuss what you should expect, be aware of, and understand about recovery. Then, we invite you to ask questions or share your experience. Send us a message in the comments section below. We’ll try to get back to you personally and promptly.

What You Should Expect In Early RecoveryBecoming clean and sober is the first step in recovery. While at an inpatient rehab program, the addict will only begin to think clearly and deal with why they use drugs. At this point, it is like the addict is waking up from a coma and is only starting from where they left off before the drugs took over. Emotions will be raw and the addict may not be able to handle too much at first. However, you do not want this opportunity of vulnerability to close. Helping an addict open up and deal with the underlying causes of their addiction is what recovery is all about.

The Bare Minimum
An addict should be in active recovery every day. Whichever program they choose, they should be:

• In support group meetings
• In psychotherapy (individual or group counseling)
• And/or following a recovery protocol or relapse prevention plan

These actions need to take place every day for a minimum of one year. If an addict stops the actions needed to maintain sobriety, s/he can easily fall back into old patterns.

An Open Book
An addict who wants to be sober and live a clean life is very observable. If an addict is serious about recovery, their lives will be an open book. The will let you in and not keep secrets or disappear or refuse drug tests or make excuses for why they are acting different.

This is not to say that old patterns are easy to break… but if an addict is ready to move on with their life, they will want everyone to know they are clean and sober. They will not have a reason to hide from friends and family anymore. They may be shameful of their past behavior but honesty will be their number one priority. You will notice a sincerity you have not seen in them since maybe before they became addicted.

Increased Trust Over Time
Family members can expect to still have the old fears and rightfully so, but over time trust will be regained. It is completely normal fear to let an addict to go to the bathroom in your home with the door closed. These fears are real but you must trust your instincts because you will know the minute they are using again.

The Dry Drunk
What happens if the addict is clean and sober but their attitude remains the same? Some refer to this behavior in a recovering addict as a dry drunk. Just because a person can abstain from using drugs, their behavior may be the same as when they were drinking and drugging. A dry drunk is not committed to, nor participating in, a program of addiction recovery.

This could simply be an issue where the addict is angry and has no other way of coping. They might lack coping skills and that is why they used drugs in the first place. They may have underlying anger issues or problems they have yet to address, so they act out instead of use drugs. Most families are so relieved that the drug use is over, they will tolerate just about anything.

If this is the scenario you are experiencing with your sober loved one, then it might be a good idea to insist they seek therapy. You can still create boundaries, much like you did when they were using drugs. You have every right to not be a victim to this type of behavior. We know from experience that forcing an addict to get clean does not work and forcing a dry drunk to get help may not work either, so setting up boundaries and being clear about what you expect is a great way to not repeat the same old cycle you were in before.

The One-Time Relapse
An addict may also relapse. This is a common fear among family members and a very real one. If the addict is not coping in the real world well and finds life to be too overwhelming, their urge to use drugs will be too strong. However, a very high percentage of drug users relapse. It’s actually quite common.

If you find the recovering addict has relapsed, first know that you do not need to shut them out of your lives. You may offer them a way to go back into recovery. Life without drugs may be too much for them to handle. Most people go back to old patterns and what they know best when they feel lost, trapped, or hopeless. This is a sign that the addict may need more help or a different kind of help.  Recovering from a relapse can mean that a person can just get up and return to recovery, but there are addicts to which this behavior is chronic.

The Chronic Relapser
Different from a one-time relapse is the chronic relapser. This person will flip-flop between sobriety and using at a moment’s notice. They will play on your sympathies. They will start to move away from sober living and recovery programs. It is just a matter of time before this person will most likely go back to their full blown addiction. You will have to stay strong and recognize that this person is not ready for recovery. The key is to not let the merry-go-round of addiction and co-addiction start again.

MAIN TIP: Deal In Facts Only
A family may be asking how they will be able to navigate their loved ones recovery, alleviate old fears, and gain trust back. Sometimes, the fear that an addict is clean and will use again is overwhelming. You feel like you are walking on eggshells and you do not want to do anything to possibly set that person off. The truth is, if an addict really wants to be clean, he or she will not make excuses but will be honest and work at their sobriety every single day.

So, to conclude, family members must deal in facts only. So many promises have been broken and there is no trust in the addict and so the family has two things they must understand when an addict comes home. Your gut feeling is your best guide, you know from the past what an active addict looks and sounds like. You know when something is not right or if you are being lied to.

The other key piece is getting the facts. Do not trust or believe an addict for their words, you can only trust the actions you see. If an addict is clean then there should be no excuse as to why they cannot take an impromptu drug test. Who needs drug testing? Anyone who used to take drugs! Do not believe what an addict tells you, even if they are sober, they must show you. There must be proof of what they are saying.

If they are going to an outpatient recovery program then you should be able to be in contact with that program director. If the facts are there, then trust will come in time. This is a rocky period for everyone and establishing a list of things you expect while being supportive may be the best way to get through it.

Alcohol rehabilitation program definition
An alcohol rehabilitation program is a service that provides treatment and recovery services to someone who abuses or has become addicted to alcohol. Alcohol rehabilitation programs can be inpatient or outpatient. They provide detox services, psychological treatment and counseling. Aftercare programs or referral to aftercare services round up alcohol rehabilitation treatment.

Alcohol rehabilitation program goals
There are several goals that alcohol rehabilitation programs aim to achieve. The main goals of alcohol rehabilitation are to:

1. End alcohol abuse
2. Improve overall health
3. Treat psychiatric disorders and psychological problems
4. Re-integration as a productive member of society

One of the first and most important goals of alcohol rehabilitation is to end alcohol abuse. This goal will be achieved by making personal, interpersonal, and psychological changes in order to remain abstinent from alcohol use.

The next goal is to improve overall health. In addition to the benefits of sobriety, alcohol rehab programs also aim to reduce future health risks, which often present themselves when someone has been abusing alcohol for a significant period of time.

Another alcohol rehabilitation goal is to treat psychiatric disorders and psychological problems. Often, when alcohol has been abused for a significant amount of time, a person experiences underlying psychological trauma or psychiatric disorders that have stemmed from abuse or previous events. When you quit drinking and enter a rehabilitation program, these issues will typically surface and cause you to want to drink or exit the program. Alcohol rehabilitation programs aim to treat these psychological problems in order to secure a chance at remaining sober in the future.

The last goal of alcohol rehabilitation programs are to help you integrate back into society. It is important that former alcoholics meet employment and educational needs, resolve legal problems, and improve their own personal circumstances. These goals aim to give the patient a positive future and set them up for success outside of the program.

What happens during an alcohol rehabilitation program?

1. Alcohol assessment – Upon entering any alcohol rehabilitation program, the staff at the facility usually assess your personal situation and create a program that is unique to you. This will likely include a drug test, a psychological screening and an assessment of both medical and  personal circumstances. The aim here is to understand the extent of alcohol abuse and to create a program that will allow you to succeed.

2. Detox from alcohol – The alcohol detox process will begin 3-5 hours after the last drink, but will oftentimes not require anything more than medical supervision. In extreme cases, medication may be necessary. However, in most cases medical staff will only need to monitor you to ensure safety as you clear alcohol from your system. Some rehab programs provide detox services in-house, while others will refer you to inpatient clinics.

3. Psychotherapy/Psychological Alcoholism Treatment – This is one of the most important phases of rehabilitation, as psychological treatments give you a base for future sobriety. This phase of alcohol rehabilitation helps you to analyze and assess your mental and emotional condition in order to make positive changes and prevent relapse.

4. Phamacotherapy – Currently, pharmacotherapy or medications for alcohol dependence are assessed on an individual basis and will be implemented along with psychosocial treatment. Medications to deter drinking such as Antabuse (disulfiram) can be helpful. Additionally, acamprosate and naltrexone have been used to help reduce cravings and acute alcohol withdrawal symptoms. While these medications can support sobriety, you should have a true desire to change beliefs, behaviors, and patterns for the medications to be most effective.

5. Alcohol abuse education – Education is important during alcohol rehabilitation, as it aims to give you information about alcoholism and alcohol abuse. You will understand more about HOW alcohol affects the brain and central nervous system and WHY physical or psyhological dependence occurs. Theories for addiction and alcoholism can help you make more rational choices to avoid alcohol in the future.

6. Supportive services – This is the final step of alcohol rehabilitation, and support services aim to empower a former alcoholic to seek services outside of treatment in order to maintain abstinence from alcohol. Rehab programs can connect you with halfway houses, social assistance, or medical help. A good alcohol rehab program will help you begin to create a network of supportive people to influence your life once you graduate from the treatment program.

What happens after an alcohol rehabilitation program?
After alcohol rehabilitation, it is important to continue to seek help from your local community. The most important thing to consider after an alcohol rehabilitation program is having an aftercare program that allows you continued treatment and a safe environment to maintain sobriety.

Often, alcohol counseling is recommended for at least one year (once weekly) after alcohol rehab program attendance. Participation in groups like Alcoholics Anonymous, SMART recovery or another community or church group that you can be a part of positive support. There are also services, like sober living houses, that can give you a safe environment to live in while entering back in to the normal realm of every day life.

Alcohol rehabilitation questions
Do you still have questions about the process of rehab? Please ask us your questions here. We’ll try to get back to you personally and promptly, or refer you to outside help.

Here, we’ll review who is best served by rehab and what you can expect during a typical stay. Then, we invite your questions about drug rehab centers at the end. In fact, we try to respond to all questions personally and promptly.

Who needs drug treatment rehab centers?

If you need to use drugs (any psychoactive substance) to get through the day, you may need addiction treatment. In fact, one of the best indications that a person needs a drug rehab center is psychological dependence on your drug of choice. Psychological dependence is characterized by:

1. drug craving
2. drug use despite negative life consequences
3. loss of control of drug use

Physical dependence on a drug can also signal need for drug treatment.  This occurs when a person’s brain and body become accustomed to functioning with the drug. When a physically dependent person stops taking the drug, they will typically experience withdrawal symptoms that can be relived by using the drug again.

Who else can benefit from a drug treatment rehab center?

People who

• are faced with legal problems regarding drug use
• are unable to stop using their drug of choice
• experience mood swings or violent behavior
• experience relationship and family problems
• have decreased work or school performance because of drugs
• neglect other responsibilities in favor of using drugs
• see an increase in health problems related to drug use
• spend a great deal of time using, trying to find, or recovering from their drug of choice

Going to drug rehab treatment centers

The goal of drug rehab treatment is to ultimately live a drug-free life. An effective treatment program will help you understand addiction and give you the skills you need to resist the temptation to use again. For many, going to rehab centers is much less intimidating when you know what to expect from a drug rehab program. So what happens in a drug rehab treatment center?

1. Initial intake

When you first start drug rehab, you will undergo an intake assessment. This is used to determine the severity of the addiction, and will ultimately be used to create an addiction treatment plan. Assessments usually include interviews, urine/blood tests, and a medical exam. During intake, you will be assigned a lead counselor (usually a certified psychologist) who will be your main contact throughout treatment.  Additionally, you will be shown the facilities and be introduced to patients currently enrolled in rehab. This begins your stay at a drug rehab treatment center.

2. The treatment itself

Your addiction treatment plan will include several psychological treatments, including therapy and counseling. Medications are also sometimes used to treat certain drug addictions. In fact, a combination of pharmacological and behavioral interventions often shows greater success than either used alone.

3. Daily or weekly sessions

If you choose an inpatient drug rehab treatment center, you will be required to reside in the treatment facility. This intensive drug rehab treatment can last anywhere from a month to a year and is organized around a strict daily routine.  Expect to be present and accounted for multiple times throughout the day for individual sessions, group sessions, educational sessions, exercise, and meal time.

In comparison, outpatient drug rehab often requires 1-3 hours of attendance per day or multiple sessions per week.  While less rigorous in terms of time requirements, outpatient drug treatment rehab is often most successive when it is intensive in nature, 9+ or more hours per week.

Reasons to go to drug rehab treatment
There are several reasons to go to drug rehab for addiction treatment. Of course, it can sometimes be difficult to think of these reasons when you’re struggling with a drug addiction, so we’ve put together a list for you. Once you overcome addiction, you’ll be able to

• be more productive
• enjoy a healthier lifestyle
• regain your loved ones’ respect and trust
• repair broken relationships
• stay away from legal troubles
• stop wasting your money on drugs

Who is affected by drug addiction?

An addict as well as everyone around him or her is affected by drug addiction. After using drugs for a period of time, a person’s health will often start to decline. Drug abuse can also cause a number of financial, family, and social problems for an addict.

An addict’s family is also strongly affected by drug addiction. They will often feel helpless and frustrated in the face of addiction. In many cases, a drug addiction can cause family members to lose trust in and respect for their loved ones.

Drug rehab centers truly help addicts as well as their loved ones. After overcoming their addictions, addicts can live much healthier lives. They can also work toward reconciling with their family and friends that they hurt while they were doing drugs.




Reference Sources: Medline Plus: Substance use disorder State of Kentucky: Signs of alcoholism and addictionSAMHSA: Screening, Assessment, and Drug Use TestingNIDA: The Clinical Assessment of Substance Use Disorder

How do we – the people in long term recovery from addiction – sabotage ourselves? A review of our common mistakes (and how to avoid them). More here, with a section at the end for you to share with us your experience, strength, and hope.

Living In The “Real World”After getting sober a few 24-hours ago, I realized that I had absolutely no idea how to live in the “real world”. Turning the tables, working the steps and staying out of trouble gave me a life better than I could have ever imagined. That’s still true today.

I did not start learning about how to manage other parts of my life – aside from staying sober – until I had several years in addiction recovery. Am I a late bloomer? Likely. The fact is that learning how to maximize our second chance at life takes work, much like staying clean.

Big Results Come From Big Efforts
I do not believe in luck. I do not believe in handouts. I don’t think anything worth doing happens overnight. To achieve big results, we must put forth big efforts.

Self-Sabotage In Addiction Recovery
One thing many recovering people have in common is self-sabotage. We unknowingly attempt to fix that which cannot be fixed, plan what cannot be planned and worrying incessantly about everything that does not matter.

I know this certainly described me in early recovery. If I’m not careful to constantly make recovery and self-improvement my top priorities, I could easily fall back into a pit of self-pity.

Do you want to fail at everything you try? Here are 5 surefire ways to do just that.

5 Ways To Fail At Everything
1.  Always expect immediate results without putting in the work.

Sound familiar? I know it does to me. Remember that addiction is a disease of instant gratification. Why else did we use? We wanted to feel better, right now.

I’ve got news for you. Getting results with anything in life that will be worthwhile, results that will last, and results that you can be proud of will take time. Getting good results at anything in life will require a sacrifice of time, energy and commitment.

For example, a body builder may train for years before ever entering a competition. I go to the gym about 4 days per week. I’m not a body builder, nor do I possess super human strength. My only goal is to take care of my body and stay as healthy as I can. That’s it.

There are some people who are at the gym every day, sweating, muscles flexing and giving it 110% effort. Many of these people are friends of mine. I know how committed and driven they are: Counting every calorie, never missing a workout, taking supplements and staying away from junk food. These men and women are hitting the weights when most of us are still counting sheep.

Why?

They know that results ain’t cheap, results don’t come easy and results never come quickly.

I always see a new round of folks at the gym on January 2nd each year. They come in with the best of intentions, likely following a New Year’s Resolution to finally get into shape. Most of these folks stop showing up after a month or so. I always wonder why. My best guess is that they lack the desire and commitment to making a lasting change, so they take the easy way out.

REMEMBER THIS: Your success in life and in recovery is directly proportionate to your level of commitment. DO NOT GIVE UP! Just keep showing up.

2.  You focus only on problems and not solutions.

When I read about this concept in a certain recovery book, I was blown away. The first time I really considered what this simple statement meant was about 10 years ago, and my life has not been the same since.

As addicted people, we are wired to focus on what is not working. Drugs and alcohol took away the sting of our problems and allowed us to temporarily escape reality. Instead, have hope in addiction recovery!

I don’t know about you, but recovery helps me to face reality and look it in the eye. Not only is facing reality the purest form of living, it is the only form of living I want anything to do with.

REMEMBER THIS: Instead of complaining and worrying about what is wrong in your life, make the decision to look at is right and build on that. The answers will come when we become solution focused.

3.  Being obsessed with the future.

Pretty simple, and I know you have heard this before. How easy it is to forget!

Though we must plan for the future, it is important to remain focused on the here and now. What can you do right now to inch towards your goals? What could you do today to make tomorrow just a little bit better?

Think hard about this. One of the great lessons I’ve ever learned is that life is happening now. I can’t live tomorrow today, nor can I go back and erase yesterday. It’s done. Life is what happens when you’re planning for the future. The future will come, or it won’t. You are alive and reading this right now.

REMEMBER THIS: Do something today to improve yourself. You will go to bed satisfied, accomplished, and wanting to do it all over again.

4.  You are a walking, talking excuse.

I will start exercising on the first of the year. I’ll stop eating fast food after I go grocery shopping. I’ll stop smoking once I start exercising, but won’t start exercising until I go grocery shopping. I’d make some changes today, but…

THIS IS PURE INSANITY and SELF-SABOTAGE.

Anything after the word “BUT” is B.S. Stop making excuses and get busy. Don’t wait until the time is perfect. It never will be (see item #3). Right now is the perfect time. Manage your time or it will manage you.

REMEMBER THIS: Eliminate the B.S. excuses you’ve been making and get busy! These addiction recovery ideas can help you stay on track.

5.  You are constantly comparing yourself to others.

This is a great way to fail at everything.

The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel    – Steven Furtick

We usually compare our worst attributes to the best attributes of others. If someone is thinner, richer, prettier, or seems to have it all together, I can assure you they do not. They struggle too, but you do not see it. All we get to see is the wrapper – the external – or what others present to the world. When we compare ourselves to others, we are usually doing so by comparing external variables: What kind of car they drive, how they look, where they live, etc.

REMEMBER THIS: Remember that everyone struggles with something. Don’t gauge your progress in life against anyone but yourself. Set goals to make yourself feel good.

How can you frame your prayers for someone who is struggling with addiction? We offer some suggestions here. Then, we invite your questions, comments, or experiences about praying forsomeone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol at the end.

An Addict Makes Her Own Choices

Many times, when we have a loved one who is addicted, the best thing we can do is stand back and let them make their own choices. It can be upsetting to watch them make unhealthy and self-harming decisions, but that doesn’t mean that we are completely helpless when it comes to recovery.

Q: What can you do about it?
A: Pray

“Son, my father told me recently, the only true weapon that had any effect on me…was to pray. There were even times I could feel the prayers and many days they gave me a new courage to take a step.”  

My father struggled with alcoholism for many years, and until he was ready to make the change, we were unable to save him from his choices. However, what we could do was pray.

6 Things To Pray For
Here are six things you can pray for regarding an addict:

1. Pray for acknowledgement.
Pray that your loved one will realize they have an addiction and that they are hurting themselves and others around them.

2. Pray that they move past self-pity and loathing.
After my father had gained awareness about his disease, he had to move past the hate, shame and guilt he put on himself after years of addiction. Pray that they will understand how valuable their lives are that that their experiences could one day be used to help heal others.

3. Pray for desire to heal.
After my father moved from self-loathing and pity, he was finally ready to seek healing. However, he had to find a reason to heal that was stronger than his desire to drink. Pray that the addict in your life finds the reason they want to quit, and it will help them move past their substance abuse.

4. Pray for properly trained support.
Addicts needs support that is not only physical but spiritual. They need help figuring out their triggers, turning points, and what gives them the courage to get through the day. Pray that the addict in your life not only finds support from family and friends, but also finds strong accountability.

5. Pray that God gives them the strength.
Addicts have to make the choice NOT TO USE DRUGS OR ALCOHOL each and every day. They have to choose to go against their desire and choose the healthiest path. Pray that God helps your loved one to choose the path and keeps them whole.

6. Pray for forgiveness.
Breaking the cycle of addiction is not easy. The addict in your life may take a couple steps forward, and a couple steps back. Pray that you can offer the forgiveness they need when they make mistakes. Moreover, be willing to forgive many times as they walk this difficult path toward recovery.

Our Prayers Have Value
My father has worked incredibly hard to work past his addiction to become a healthy person. I am so proud of him and the work he did to become the wonderful man he is today. It was only through applying God’s principles to his personal journey that he was able to overcome obstacles and create a life of peace.

No matter what, our prayers have value, and they can help those who are struggling with addiction to move forward toward healing and rehabilitation.

In your Service,
Stephen Scoggins

Photo credit: Wiki Media Commons


Does everything seem to revolve around the addict in your family? How does a family member’s drug addiction hurt your family? We will address how addiction impacts not only the addict but their entire family and give you some suggestions on how to help your family heal. Then, we invite your questions, comments, and experiences at the end.

Addiction Creates A New Norm
There becomes a new norm when a person in the family is grappling with addiction. Typically, when a family member has an issue, the family can get together to help that person get through the rough time. With addiction it may not be that simple. 

Why? Because addiction and family dysfunction often come together.

There is no one way to deal with an addict and because we love that person, sometimes what is best for them does not seem like it. The more help your family provides, it seems like the deeper the addict goes into their addiction. The more you create an environment of love and support, the more the addict lies and manipulates friends and family.

Why Do Addicts End Up Hurting Their Families?
At first, they may be escaping some issue or pain. The addict knows that what they are doing is not right but they cannot help their urge to get high and escape. Then by the time they realize what is happening, they are physically and psychologically addicted to the high. Now they have to choose their family or their drug.

The drug usually wins.

An addict may not intend on hurting family. But in order to keep getting high they have no choice. Their internal struggle soon gets diluted in their high and, in time, hurting their family just becomes part of the process of getting what they need; drugs.

Division: The New Family Norm
All of the lies, the disappointment, the irresponsibility and watching a loved one hurt themselves can become very taxing; not just on the addict but especially on the family.  The family feels genuine pain alongside the addict.

Sometimes, this can tear families apart, leaving people in separate corners. The family can become divided. Some family members become enablers and some become distant to the addict, casting them out of their lives. Family members start to argue on how to handle the addict; some frustrated by the enabling and others frustrated by what seems like cruel treatment.

Now, not only is the addict struggling, but the family is hurt, divided, fighting and possibly separating. Addiction can impact the family in such a way that it can cause members to stop talking to one another. Addiction can trigger divorce and cause families to have ill feelings towards one another. It seems unfair that the family has an addict to take care of and now has to also deal with the secondary issues occurring within the unit.

Mend The Divide
Even if the addict is not in recovery, the family can be! Though the family may not agree on the best course of action…that is part of the road to recovery. Have hope that addiction and family issues can be worked out, and you CAN come to a point of agreement.

There will come a point where everyone in the family will become frustrated. In fact, it is important for there to be a divide, so mending the family can follow. If every family member does not do what they think is best and explore every avenue, they will feel they did not do everything they could do. Each person must go through their own journey and experience the addict on their own terms. Some need to learn how to love an addict without enabling them. Others need to come to a level of acceptance.

Once everyone has done their part, it is time to get together and re-evaluate the situation. Not everyone may get exactly what they want, but a balance can be achieved. This process can be a relief for families and allow them to start to trust one another again and feel like they are on the same team. Including a specialist may really help each person see their part and how they can get together and be on the same page in regards to the addict. Who can you ask for help?

• an intervention specialist
• a certified representative from Alcoholics Anonymous
• or a psychotherapist…

Each of these professionals can help the family come together and do what is best for the addict. A divided family can allow an addict to play family members against one another. An addict may find it easier to get what they need when they can do this. They can tell mom that dad is mean and make mom feel sorry for them. But remember: ENABLING does not help an addict!

When an addict sees that the family stands firm, a wall is created that is harder for the addict to penetrate. Mending a family can help the family heal regardless of the state of the addict but may also help the addict in the process.

Alcohol rehab process and procedures
Overcoming an alcohol problem is not a simple process. Quitting drinking for good requires a great deal of work and dedication from both the recovering alcoholic and the rehab specialists.

In order to better understand the alcohol rehab process and procedures, you should realize that it is usually broken down into several different stages. The four major stages of alcohol rehab include:

1. Assessment of the problem

Before anyone can be treated for an alcohol addiction, they must first be assessed by qualified professionals. During this assessment, a recovering alcoholic will undergo a complete mental health exam. This will help addiction specialists determine the severity of the addiction as well as identify and diagnose any underlying mental health problems. Additionally, assessment can include a drug test to evaluate whether or not detox will be necessary.  The initial assessment is also used to determine the best course of treatment during alcohol rehab.

2. Alcohol detox (if necessary)

When you enter an alcohol rehab center, you may be admitted into a detox clinic within the facility.  Medical detox is recommended for heavy to seriously addicted alcoholics.  Alcohol withdrawal can very uncomfortable, with symptoms such as nausea, vomiting, tremors, insomnia, anxiety, and depression. Seizures, hallucinations and delerium can also occur during alcohol detox.  Some alcohol rehab facilities offer medical detox services, which can be used to help treat symptoms with medications and prevent early relapse. Other alcohol rehab facilities, on the other hand, may require that you seek detox in a separate clinic before entry.

3. Alcoholism psychological and pharmaceutical treatments  

Counseling and behavior therapy are some of the most common methods used to treat alcoholism. While attending the several therapy and counseling sessions in alcohol rehab, recovering alcoholics will learn a number of different methods to cope with and overcome addiction to alcohol. Various medications can also be used to help treat alcohol addictions. Some of these medications make people ill when they drink and others reduce the pleasure that an alcoholic feels when drinking.

4. Aftercare

Alcohol rehab often lasts for several months or years, even after completing a month long inpatient rehab program. Regular therapy and counseling sessions can help recovering alcoholics maintain their abstinence and cope with everyday problems.  A good alcohol rehab will help coordinate aftercare treatments for you, which can include living in a halfway house, alcoholism counseling, attendance in support groups, and/or outpatient alcohol rehab.  Continued care is very important to maintaining sobriety. After care programs aim to prevent relapse by connecting you with local resources and give you the best chances for an alcohol free life.

Is alcohol rehab successful?
The main goal of any alcohol rehab program is to treat an alcoholic and help him or her become productive and self-sufficient without the use of alcohol. Overall, alcohol treatment is usually successful. However, its success depends on a couple of very important factors.

First, a person must be willing to dedicate himself to staying in recovery. This is usually not a problem if a person is motivated and willing to make a change. Support from loved ones is also a very important factor when it comes to whether or not a recovering alcoholic will stay in treatment.

Alcohol rehab professionals also play a small part in the success of the treatment. They must be able to develop a treatment plan based on each individual person’s wants and needs, for instance. They should also be ready to evaluate a recovering alcoholic’s progress and make any necessary changes to the treatment plan.

Is alcohol rehab effective?
In the long run, alcohol rehab is very effective compared to the alternative. Let’s take a look at the economic aspects of it.

According to a study released by the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) and the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), alcoholism in the United States cost the United States and its citizens roughly $148 billion dollars in 1992. These costs included lost wages, loss of productivity, health problems, legal matters, family problems, and civil matters. The monetary value of treatment in the same year, on the other hand, was equal to just a small percentage of this.

The overall effectiveness of individual alcohol rehab, however, mostly comes down to the person going through it. basically, you get back what you put into it. There are a few things that can be done to make treatment more effective, such as staying away from places and people that may trigger you to drink. A recovering alcoholic will also benefit from a strong support system of understanding friends and family members. Some recovering alcoholics may even find it helpful to post a list of the reasons they quit drinking where they can see it every day. Finally, treatment for recovering alcoholics that participate in follow-up treatment is generally more effective.

In her helpful and significant workbook “Letting Go of Self-Destructive Behaviors“, author and expertLisa Ferentz, LCSW-C teaches you to overcome self-destructive behavior. Read more about how and why this book can help you overcome self-harming urges here. Then, ask your questions about self harm urges at the end.

Do You Know Why You’re Harming Yourself?

“Self-destructive behavior is often a non verbal way to communicate to other people deeper information about your thoughts, feelings, needs, and experiences. Hurting your body may be a form of self-punishment. Unresolved guilt, shame and unwarranted self-blame about past trauma and neglect can leave you vulnerable to the idea that you “deserve” to be hurt. When you are lacking of self-compassion, self-harm is always possible.” – Lisa Ferentz

Stop Self Harming Urges Now!

It is completely normal and healthy to want to avoid pain and find a way to express your life experiences. You’re not making harmful choices because there is something wrong with you. You make harmful choices because no one ever showed you how to make good choices or made you feel worthy of good choices. However, true healing can begin when you learn to separate who you are from what happened to you.

So, how can you stop self harming urges? Be open to the idea that how and where you hurt yourself is not accidental, coincidental, or meaningless. You are using your body as a “canvas”, showing the pain you cannot talk about. Eating disorders, addictions, and self-mutilation become a way for sexual, emotional, and physical abuse to be communicated.

Why Check Out The Workbook?

1.  You’ll get a better understanding of self-harm.

In this book, Lisa provides thorough analysis of the self-destructive behaviors, what they mean, how are they performed, and what causes them. Even through a book, Lisa connects with us as readers on real personal level. Covering the psychological aspects of these disorders, the reader can truly understand his/her condition which is the first step to overcome self-destruction.

2.  You’ll be offered a strengths based solution.

The author offers a step-by-step method to help you release repressed emotions. While best used with the help of a qualified mental health professional (a licensed clinical psychologist), her caution in taking deeper steps gives the reader reliability – you feel you’re in safe hands. The exercises included in the book cover the therapy process in whole, while simultaneously helping you identify internal and external triggers and help in their avoidance and confrontation.

3.  You’ll be given new hope.

Lisa continuously states that one of the most valuable things for us to hold on to is the idea that everything about us makes sense given what we’ve experienced and where we’ve come from. When we can connect to our emotions and behaviors to past trauma or overwhelming past or present stress, the pieces begin to fit together, and the “symptoms” will start to make more sense to us.

Why Do We Recommend This Book?

Using journaling exercises, drawing and collaging prompts, guided imagery, visualizations, and other behavioral techniques, this book will make you understand, compassionately work with, and heal from these behaviors rather than distracting from or fighting against them, which can dramatically reduce internal conflict and instil genuine hope.

A Note For Mental Health Professionals

There are four major principles that go along with the strengths-based approach to treating self-destructive behaviors: normalizing, universalizing, depathologizing, and re-framing. Here are some key considerations when working with adolescents and young people who are in the cycle of self-destructuve patterns.

• Most people do not come into the therapy process or approach this work with an awareness of how early childhood attachment and relationship dynamics profoundly impact current behaviors and a core sense of self. These should be unfold in time with help of a trained professional.
• Promote the role of attachment and its impact on people’s ability to handle their emotional states.

Stop Self Harm Urges

Wondering where you can find “Letting Go of Self-Destructive Behaviors”? from  Lisa Ferentz? To buy, download and read the book, check her site lisaferentz.com.  Additionally, if you are left with any questions about this book, we ask you to post them in the section below. We also welcome your feedback if you’ve read the book, and would like to comment and share your opinion.

Inpatient alcohol rehab requires at least a 28 day stay, but can be extended as needed. However, inpatient alcohol rehab is usually well worth the time. What can you expect about how long inpatient alcohol rehab lasts? Read on for the facts.

Considering inpatient alcohol rehab?
That’s good news.

Generally, inpatient alcohol rehab is recommended for people who have tried to stop drinking on their own but have failed…or those whose home environment makes it really hard to quit. Why?

First of all, individuals in inpatient alcohol rehab programs don’t have any access to alcohol and are therefore much less likely to relapse during treatment. Additionally, an intense inpatient alcohol rehab program helps recovering alcoholics focus on the issues which underlie addiction without temptation or distraction. Finally, an inpatient rehab offers a very structured environment, crucial to re-establishing health life routines. But how long does rehab typically last for an average stay? And what can you expect?

Inpatient alcohol rehab: How long does it last?
There are a couple of main types of inpatient alcohol rehab. Depending on the severity of an alcohol problem, a person may benefit from either traditional inpatient alcohol rehab or long-term alcohol rehab. So how long inpatient alcohol rehab lasts depends upon individual diagnosis and situation.

1.  Traditional inpatient alcohol rehab

A traditional alcohol rehab program requires at least a 28-30 day stay in an alcohol rehab facility. This type of treatment is usually recommended for individuals with moderate drinking problems. Treatment typically includes individual counseling and group therapy, and sometimes family counseling. Others may be encouraged to stay for a total of 60-90 days. Three (3) months is about the maximum amount of time for this traditional model of alcoholism treatment.

2.  Long-term inpatient alcohol rehab

Individuals with severe drinking problems may be better suited to long-term inpatient alcohol rehab programs. These programs can last anywhere from three months to a year, and typically include individual and family counseling as well as group therapy. Group living situations are arranged, as are vocational training and attendance in alcoholism support groups. Intensity of treatment changes over time with this model. The most intensive treatments usually occur in the first three (3) and taper down in the weeks and months that pass.

Inpatient alcohol rehab duration and time
So what generally happens during a stint in an inpatient alcohol rehab center? There are general rehab rules and life is very structured. During inpatient alcohol rehab, recovering alcoholics will live together and go through therapy together. Daily group therapy sessions are often required, as are individual counseling sessions. Lunch is prepared for you and free time is minimal. Days are usually filled with education sessions, 12 step meetings, and psychotherapy.

Inpatient alcohol rehab: A timeline of what happensInpatient alcohol rehab can often be broken down into easily identifiable stages. Here is an inpatient alcohol rehab timeline to give you an idea of what you can expect.

Day 1: Evaluation

The first day of inpatient alcohol rehab includes screening and clinical assessment. This process generally takes a few hours, at most, and will include an interview process and a urinalysis drug screen. Based on the results of the initial evaluation, alcohol rehab staff prepare a treatment plan for the rest of your stay. The first evaluation offers staff a baseline of where you are at the beginning of the rehab process. Throughout your stay, treatments are reviewed, new assessments are made and your treatment plan will be adjusted accordingly.

Week 1: Detoxification

While some people may never need alcohol detox (those who are not physically dependent on alcohol), the detoxification stage can provoke serious side effects for long-term or heavy drinkers. This is the period of time in which the body tries to adjust to functioning without alcohol. It is also the period of time that withdrawal symptoms are the worst and can provoke seizures, hallucinations, or delerium tremens. Some inpatient alcohol rehab programs offer on-site detoxification services, which can last from a fews days to a week, or longer in severe cases.

Weeks 1 to 4: Psychological treatments

A wide range of psychological treatments are used during the course of any inpatient alcohol rehab program. The daily therapy and counseling sessions are used to address underlying psychological problems and teach recovering alcoholics how to cope without drinking. It’s also helpful to work out interpersonal patterns during group therapy sessions. Psychological treatments for alcoholism last for the course of an inpatient rehab program and for several months or years after completing the program.

Weeks 1 to…: Medical treatments

Medications can be prescribed during inpatient alcohol rehab to help ease acute withdrawal or to treat alcohol cravings. Underlying mental health issues may also be treated using antidepressants or anti anxiety medications. Staff psychiatrists or medical doctors evaluate, diagnose, and prescribe medications during inpatient alcohol rehab as necessary. However, medicines are not “magic pills”. They can help aid recovery, but should be accompanied by psychological or behavioral therapies in order to be most successful.

Months 2 to 6: Transition

Leaving an inpatient alcohol rehab program is often an intense and difficult experience for a recovering addict. To minimize the shock of going from a monitored and alcohol-free facility to a society full of temptations, many inpatient alcohol rehab programs offer step down programs. These are used to help make the transition back into society easier and smoother. During this stage, a recovering alcoholic may reside in a halfway/sober living house but will be free to come and go whenever he pleases. This stage of treatment will usually last until a recovering alcoholic feels ready to face the world alone.

Months 2 to …?: Maintenance

After inpatient alcohol rehab, recovering alcoholics will usually start outpatient treatment. This usually includes periodic visits with license clinical psychologists and group therapy sessions. Many recovering alcoholics find themselves in this maintenance stage for several years, or even for the rest of their lives.

Can inpatient alcohol rehab be forced?
It’s quite difficult to force someone into inpatient alcohol rehab. The best action you can take is to stage an intervention if you believe your loved one needs treatment. The best interventions are planned with an expert, certified interventionist or a psychotherapist using the CRAFT model. The goal of an intervention is treatment.

To do this, gather a few close friends and family members to sit down and talk with the alcoholic. Professional guidance is crucial. During an intervention, you will explain that the drinking is causing problems, and make it clear that you would be supportive if they decided to seek treatment.

If an alcoholic refuses to admit he has a problem or refuses treatment, some states allow you to petition that s/he is involuntarily committed to a rehab program. To do this, a petition will need to be filed with your local court. If the court finds that the person is a danger to himself or others, a judge might order him to complete an inpatient alcohol rehab program.

Inpatient alcohol rehab time
It’s no secret that inpatient alcohol rehab is time consuming. However, it’s usually very effective and more than worth the time spent. If you’re considering inpatient alcohol rehab and still have questions, feel free to leave them in the comments section below. We look forward to helping our readers get the help they need.