Yes, alcohol rehabilitation works.

How do you know that it’s been successful? The goal of alcohol rehabilitation is to help individuals overcome their drinking problems and go through the rest of their lives functioning well without alcohol. So, alcohol rehabilitation is considered to be successful if a person is able to leave the program and stay sober. But what can you expect? And how can you increases chances for success? More here, with a section at the end for your questions.

Alcohol rehabilitation process and procedures

While not every alcohol rehabilitation program is exactly the same, the majority of them treat alcoholism in roughly the same manner. For instance, most alcohol rehab programs tackle this addiction in a few distinct steps, which are listed below.

1. Assessment of the drinking problem

Assessment of an alcohol problem usually consists of a scripted interview and a drug test. An initial assessment of an alcoholic by an addiction specialist serves a few important purposes. First of all, it helps a specialist understand more about the drinker’s habits and drinking. It might also help uncover underlying mental or emotional issues that may be contributing to their alcohol use. Additionally, assessment can be used as a baseline measure for treatment success. And ultimately, this evaluation will be used to create an individual treatment and recovery plan.

2. Medical detox or withdrawal from alcohol

The detox stage of alcohol rehabilitation is often one of the most difficult for many serious alcoholics. During detox, the body is trying to adjust to functioning without alcohol as well as get rid of any remaining alcohol in the system. This typically results in severely uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms, including:

• anxiety
• depression
• headaches
• irritability
• nausea
• shakiness vomiting

All cases of alcohol withdrawal need to be medically supervised. This is because severe symptoms (which include seizures) can manifest unexpectedly, especially in cases of chronic drinking, or high volume alcohol intake. A recovering alcoholic might go through detox in a dedicated detox facility or in a clinic which is attached to an alcohol rehabilitation center. Medical supervision is notably advised in cases of severe drinking or in those who have already experienced symptoms of delirium tremens and/or seizures during alcohol detox.

3. Alcoholism treatment

The treatment that a recovering alcoholic will receive while in alcohol rehabilitation will usually vary, depending on his or her individual situation. Frequent therapy and counseling sessions, however, are common treatment methods in any alcohol rehabilitation program. Some recovering alcoholics may also respond well to medications such as acamprosate, disulfiram, or naltrexone. Antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications may also be prescribed. However, a combination of pharmaceutical and behavioral interventions is most frequently advised and results in best cases of successful treatment.

4. The aftercare program

Alcoholism is a very powerful addiction and difficult to overcome. In order to maintain a sober lifestyle, many recovering alcoholics find that they need some sort of aftercare for several months or years after they complete an initial alcohol rehabilitation program. In fact, many consider themselves to still be “in recovery” for the rest of their lives. Aftercare can include counseling, support group attendance, outpatient rehab attendance, mentoring, coaching, alternative modalities, or living in a halfway or 3/4 way house. A good alcohol rehabilitation program will also be able to refer you to life skills training programs and/or social services when needed. Finally, be sure to have an aftercare relapse prevention plan IN HAND when you leave a rehab program. This is a MUST HAVE for anyone wanting to maintain a sober lifestyle.

Is alcohol rehabilitation successful?

In order for alcohol rehabilitation to be successful, individuals must stay in treatment and dedicate themselves to recovery. They must have motivation to stop drinking and be willing to admit to admit their problem and make an effort to change. A strong support system of non-drinking family and friends will also help individuals to stay in alcohol rehabilitation.

A person is more likely to successfully complete an alcohol rehabilitation program if he or she is following an addiction treatment plan that is based on their individual wants and needs. These care plans are usually created by addiction specialists based on an assessment as well as the input of the alcoholic.

Is alcohol rehabilitation effective?

Overall, alcohol rehabilitation is very effective. According to one study, alcohol related problems caused individuals in the United States over $100 billion dollars in one year. This included costs such as health, legal, and career problems. The cost for alcohol rehabilitation, on the other hand, was only a fraction of this. Even harm reduction strategies, an alternative to abstinence, can effectively reduce the costs associated with an alcohol problem.

There are a number of steps that recovering alcoholic can take to make alcohol rehabilitation more effective for them personally. For instance, opting to start treatment in an intensive residential alcohol rehabilitation center often helps make alcohol rehabilitation much more effective. After the intense treatment is complete, they can then be placed in a less intense treatment program on an outpatient basis. However, for alcohol rehabilitation to be completely effective, a person must be ready and willing to change.

Questions about alcohol rehabilitation?

Please leave us your questions about rehabilitation in the comments section just below. We’ll do our best to respond to you personally and promptly.

Can You Help An Addict?
Usually, you can only help someone who wants help. When it comes to addiction, though, there are stpes you can take to keep your parents accountable for their actions. Learn how you can intervene here. Then, we invite your questions about dealing with a parent who’s an addict or alcoholic in the comments section at the end. We’ll get back to you with a personal reply ASAP.

How To Help An Addict Mother Or Father?

We’ve asked someone who’s been there and has returned to tell the tale. Bria is the author of the books:

“A Stolen Childhood” – A fictional story that is briefly based on her life events
“Where Hope is Born” – A series of vignettes about growing up in a family stricken by addiction, and
“Still My Best Friend?” – A children’s story that explains the disease of addiction to young children

Using her talent of writing, she has dealt with the disease and crisis of addiction in her family. Today, Bria shares her experience about ways to help your addict mother or father and how to care for yourself in the moments of overtaking parenting. Again, please use the section below if you have a question at the end. We will do our best to give you a personal and prompt answer.

ADDICTION BLOG: What are some of the main signs that your parents are addicts? How can you be sure?

BRIA RILEY: The main sign that parents (or anyone, for that matter) are addicts is that their lifestyle, priorities, and interests begin to change because of the use of their substance or compulsive behavior of choice.

For example, if your parents were diligent workers, the main cheerleader at every one of your soccer games, and always went fishing and hiking during their days off, but once they started excessively drinking, they:

• often missed work
• didn’t perform up to par in their tasks while at work
• barely showed up at your activities
• live to drink and party on weekends

…while fishing and hiking suddenly became the last thought on their minds, these would be signs of a problem.

Another main sign is that their everyday personality starts to change. They might become more short-tempered and agitated when they definitely weren’t like that before. Addicts often become secretive and ashamed of what has become their addiction, so parents may forbid their children of speaking of their using.

Addicts lose control over their addiction, so if they are using every single day or so often that it begins to affect their life, health, or personality that is a definite cause for alarm.

If any of these examples sound all too familiar, the child of the possible addicts should consider talking to someone such as another family member, guidance counselor, or family friend about the concerns. Denial is the hallmark of addiction, so most likely, the parents will not admit it. Addiction is often a tough diagnosis, so there is no way to be 100% sure which is why others should be aware so they could also be on the lookout for the signs.

ADDICTION BLOG: How do parents try to hide their addiction?  

BRIA RILEY: Secrecy. They will often tell their child to not dare tell anyone of their using or activities related to their using. If the child tells someone, they become livid and may even implement punishment.
They may also lie to their child about where they have been, what they have been doing, and how often they have used.

When family or other spectators are around, they suddenly act like everything is stable by lying about aspects of their lives that may have been affected by their using such as their job, money, bills, activities, and using if it is a substance or behavior that it is not taboo such as alcohol, gambling, or prescribed painkillers.

ADDICTION BLOG: How can I help my parents?  

BRIA RILEY: There is no real way for the children of addicts to “help” their parents; the parents have to make their own decision to seek help. If they feel that their parent is that far gone, they can arrange an intervention, call the State’s Department of Health and Social Services, or seek help from another adult who they trust. When their parents are in recovery, kids can be loving and supportive, which will make their parents feel good about their decision to choose recovery.

ADDICTION BLOG: What should I do if/when violent behavior appears?

BRIA RILEY: Stay calm and try to not fight back or stop it. You do not want to get hurt. If it comes to the point that they are becoming physically abusive or doing any type of damage that affects others, do not hesitate to call the police, tell someone, request to live with someone else, or contact your state’s child protective services.

ADDICTION BLOG: What should my first step be when I see no way out in facing my drunk or drugged parent?

BRIA RILEY: It depends on the situation. If it is only a temporary thing like if they are really bad for a day or a few days, I would say to stay with a friend or another family member for a night or few nights. If living with them has become unbearable, I would start asking family members or any adult that is close to you that is in the position to care for you to live with them. Now if you’re a grown adult, it may break your heart, but you may just have to avoid contact with your parents.

ADDICTION BLOG: What do I need to do to take care of myself?

BRIA RILEY: They should definitely educate themselves on the disease of addiction so they understand what they are dealing with in terms of the complexity of the disease. They should definitely not become co-dependent (an enabler) by giving money, bailing out of jail, making excuses for work or other commitments, etc. Most importantly, they should seek help in Al-Ateen (teens) or Al-Anon (adults) meetings or other support groups, school guidance counselors, school social workers, outside counselors, or church members.

In the end, I hope that each child of an addict would all want to still live a fulfilling life so they should try to rise above by making positive decisions for themselves, and education plays a big role.

ADDICTION BLOG: Who else can I connect with so that I don’t feel so alone?

BRIA RILEY: The best way to not feel so alone is to find a group of people who can empathize (other children of addicts). The best place to find these people are support groups such as Al-Ateen or Al-Anon. Some schools may even have a support group, so I would advise that they check with a school guidance counselor or social worker. Some churches, hospitals, or other organizations may even have their own support groups. The friends made in these support groups usually become their best friends because they understand what they are going through. A person to vent to is also good to have such as a supportive family member, friend, pastor, teacher, or counselor.

ADDICTION BLOG: What do I need to do so that I don’t become an addict myself?

BRIA RILEY: Simple. Make the right decisions and monitor your behaviors throughout your life.

As I have mentioned in previous questions, education is key because it provides the opportunity and motivation for success and keeps you in line. Hang around peers who do not engage in drugs or alcohol. Believe it or not, you are who your friends are. If you never do drugs, you can’t become addicted to them, so simply choose to say, “No” to them. Now, in life, of course most people drink or gamble at some point or get injured or have a procedure that makes them need pain killers. You just have to be aware of these behaviors because addiction sneaks up on you and definitely runs in families.

ADDICTION BLOG: Do kids of addicts usually try to compensate for addiction? How?

BRIA RILEY: Sadly, I find that more children of addicts get caught up in the depression of their difficult lives that come with having addicted parents, so they may:

• turn to drugs or alcohol
• drop out of school
• perform poorly academically
• have an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy
• or even commit suicide

There is a statistic I once read saying that children of alcoholics are 85% more likely to commit suicide. On the other hand, there are also many children of addicts – like myself – who want to rise above their difficult lives that come with having addicted parents by making positive decisions such as:

• befriending the right people getting an education that will lead to a career
• getting a steady job
• becoming independent
• eventually having a loving, healthy, and stable family of their own

So, I believe that it all depends on the kid of the addict and what is going on up in their own head.

ADDICTION BLOG: What are some of the common ways that kids become adults in order to cope with addiction?  

BRIA RILEY: There are two directions they can really go in order to cope with addiction. As I’ve mentioned in the previous question, they either go down the negative or the positive path. Some of the negative ways they cope are to get caught up in their own addiction, promiscuity, crime, etc. Some of the positive ways they cope are doing well in school and making other positive decisions that will help them climb out of the unfortunate hole their parents’ addiction has put them in.

Just a side note: there are scholarships for children of addicted and/or incarcerated parents.

ADDICTION BLOG: Is there anything else you would like to share with our readers?

BRIA RILEY: If you are a child of an addict or someone who is deeply affected by a loved one’s addiction, I want you to know that I feel your pain and I am writing this advice from my own experiences. I know that you feel a lot of pain and sadness because addiction destroys lives, but it does not have to consume you. You CAN OVERCOME your adversity. Anyone is strong enough and is capable of having the right mindset to do so.

I have learned that healing is not when the trauma no longer hurts; it is when you have overcame it and can make something good and beautiful out of it. Even though I have accomplished many great things, I still feel the hurt and brokenness and sometimes have tears streaming down my face in bed at night.

If you are an addict, I beseech you to get help. Using is just a symptom to a deeper emotional problem, and you can be set free of your demons if you just seek help. Not only what you are doing is hurting you, but it is hurting your loved ones as well. Life in recovery is beautiful and can be full of greatness if you just give it a chance. I would also like to tell you that the best way to heal a broken heart is to give God all of the pieces. If you do not believe in God, at least have a higher power because that is what will help you put things in perspective and keep you sane. God Bless.

Photo credit: Lucian Milasan

By: Amanda Andruzzi

Are you married to an addict or alcoholic? You probably feel exhausted, confused, and not just a little bit angry.  We’re here to let you know that you’re not alone. But that you need to make changes.

Helping an addicted spouse may or may not end in their road to recovery. The merry-go-round you are on keeps spinning and you want to make it stop. You want to keep your marriage. But you can no longer decipher the lies from the truths.

Here, we will discuss points on how to navigate through some common issues so you can start making better decisions. Then, we invite your questions, experience(s), and comments at the end.

How To Help A Drug Addict: The Law Of Attraction

The Law of Attraction implies positive attracts positive. If you are acting in a negative way and expressing feelings of sadness and negativity, then it is likely your spouse will feed off of that and/or use this against you. If you behave in a positive way and live your life positively, despite your spouse’s addiction, it may generate positive results.

If you perpetuate anger, disappointment, and sadness, you may generate similar results in the exchange you have with your spouse. You may not be able to change someone else, but you can either inspire them to change or inspire yourself to move on.  So, what does this look like in practical, real life terms when living in a codependent marriage. How can you live with or love an active drug addict?

You Want The Lies To Stop

WHAT HAPPENS: The lies and manipulation can hurt the most. Some of us would rather our bank account be emptied for a weekend bender than have a spouse look you in the eye and tell you they are sober, when they clearly are not.

WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: If you can understand that lies are part of the addiction, the lies may not hurt as much.  If part of the disease is to hide the truth to maintain the addiction, then take a step back and expect to be lied to. You know very well, the truth from a lie, deep down inside. If you want the lies to stop, then try to trust your instincts. If something does not sound right or feel right to you, then that is the truth.

You Want Him To Get Into A Program

WHAT HAPPENS: He may have failed at rehabilitation programs, tried to kick the addiction on his own, or refused that he needs help. You are fully aware he has a problem and you know he will need help.

Rehab or detox does not always work, especially not the first time. You do not have to give up simply because your spouse has failed at recovery. You can however change your strategy. If an addict is forced to get help, it probably means they did not want to. How many times have you done something you did not want to do and kept doing it? The person who is addicted should want to get help, not feel like they are doing it for someone else.

WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: You cannot control someone into getting help, but you can make it less likely their addiction will run smoothly. Decide to stop enabling a drug addicted or alcohol husband. Shed some light on what is going on to the people around you both who do not know what is really going on. If you have open and honest conversations with people you love and trust they may be able to help and stop enabling the addict. When an addict has nowhere and no one to turn to, sometimes they will have no choice but to see just how unmanageable their life has become.

You Want Him To Stop Hanging Out With Other Drug Users

WHAT HAPPENS: You want to show him how the “friends” he is using with are not a good influence on him. You block or track his calls, you throw his phone out, hide his keys, or confront his friends but he still goes out with them. These are not his friends; these are his dealers, his drug buddies, and people who are in the same point in their life as he is. You cannot compete with anyone that he gets high with. If you try, he will just lie.

WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: So try a different approach. Stop caring about who he hangs out with and let him do what he wants to do. Stop fighting him. He knows you want him to stop. You have made the things you want him to change clear. Why play the game?

Stop playing into his addiction and let him realize that you are moving on with your life, and he is welcome to do the same. He only detests you when you try to stop him from using, so perhaps letting him know you are not happy with his addiction, that you are going to live your own life, will send a clear message; he will lose you.

Should you leave an addicted or alcoholic spouse? It’s going to be your decision. But once you decide, get help and support to follow through.  This time though, you will be showing him, not just telling him.

Can You Get Your Husband Into Recovery?

• “I will stop using as soon as I get through this stressful month at work.”
• “I need you to help me; I cannot live without you.”
• “I will stop drinking for a month, I can control it.”

You pray that each time you hear words of remorse or shame from your addicted spouse that this will really be the last time. You have read every book on recovery for families and how to help an addict and…no luck. You hang your hopes on the few stories you have heard, like urban legends, of wives who have helped their husbands into recovery. You are skeptical of anyone who tells you that you cannot fix your husband.

The truth is that YOU CANNOT CHANGE YOUR SPOUSE. This is a harsh reality. We know this. So, if you need to share and know that you are not alone, please leave us a comment here. We’ll try to get back with you ASAP.

Photo credit: Dennis Skley

The Up And Downside Of Truth

“There is almost nothing outside of you that will help in any kind of lasting way, unless you are waiting for an organ. This is the most horrible truth.” – Ann Lamott

This truth also can be the most liberating. But you must first come to accept that you can’t fix anyone no matter how much you love and cherish them. And when that loved one abuses alcohol and/or illegal drugs, focusing inside yourself rather than outside on your loved one’s problems is a challenge.

In this article, we briefly review the main traps that family and friends of addicts can fall into when it comes to loving someone who is chemically addicted to alcohol or drugs. What’s the antidote to these traps? Dig in and do the work…on YOURSELF.

More On Worrying

When you love or care for an addict, worry and “what if” become constant companions.

• What if he loses his job?
• What if she can’t take care of her kids?
• What if he lands in jail or prison?
• What if he kills someone in an auto accident?
• And worst of all, what if he dies from a drug overdose or the cumulative effects of alcoholism?

This fear is not unfounded. According to the Center for Disease Control, overdose deaths more than doubled from 1999 to 2012. In 2012 alone, there were 41,502 drug overdose deaths, of which 16,007 involved analgesics and 5,925 from heroin.

To put it another way, consider this. One person (often young) dies every 4 minutes from alcohol or other drug related problems. That’s 15 every hour or 360 every day. This is equivalent to a jumbo jet falling from the sky with no survivors every day of the year.

Enabling: Well Intentioned But Misguided

However, our worries and “What ifs” cause us to rush in and assume responsibility for our loved one’s destructive behavior. It’s called enabling and it’s a stinker. I read somewhere that addicts crave enabling like plants need water. We enable because we want to protect our loved ones. We enable because we don’t want our family to be disgraced. We enable because we don’t know what else to do. We enable because we don’t want our husband, wife, daughter or son to become another fatal statistic.

Although misguided, our actions are well-intended. After all, family and friends help one another when a member is in need. However, if our loved ones have any chance of recovery, we must get out of their way and let them take responsibility for their behavior. Enabling is not helping! We need to move the spotlight from them and shine it directly at us. To take a long, hard look inside ourselves, even when we don’t like what we see. “This is the most horrible truth.”

Accepting this horrible truth was a challenge when my adult son was abusing drugs. A loving mom, I enabled, big time. When my son stole money from me, I ignored it. When his checks bounced, I covered them. When he landed in jail, I bailed him out. And when the phone rang in the middle of the night, my heart raced.

No amount of nagging, preaching, begging, or threatening, worked. Finally, when I had enough, I went to my first twelve-step meeting and was told flat out, “This program is about you, not about your loved one.” Say what? How can this be? I was there to learn how to fix my son. I didn’t need fixing. He did.

Digging In

Turns out that nothing changed until I decided to dig deep inside myself. To toss aside my “God suit” and face the naked truth that I was the one who needed fixing. (More here on tools of codependence recovery.)

During a support group meeting, someone said, “All you have to do is to be willing.” To be willing to make recovery a priority. To be willing to unearth unhealthy behavior. To be willing to abandon my pride and embrace humility. To be willing to admit my faults, fears, and frustrations.

I’ve learned that almost everything inside of me: my thoughts, actions, beliefs, and attitudes, determines how I live my life with all of its joys and sorrows. I have choices. I can choose to live in the grip of my loved one’s addiction or I can choose to become free. This is the most liberating truth.

Do You Love An Addict? Let Us Know…So, do you love an addict but can’t get free from worry or enabling patterns? Are you looking into how to address addiction and family issues? Please leave us a comment in the section below. We’ll do our best to respond to you personally and promptly. You are not alone.

Photo credit: leasqueaky

By: Carol Weis

Hitting Bottom

For many alcoholics, it takes some kind of life altering event to admit we have a problem and seek help. It may be losing a job or a relationship, it might be a car accident or a DUI, or for some, it may mean losing the family they love. For me, it was vomiting up a bottle of wine as my five-year-old asked if I was okay that finally pushed me to get sober. For my brother, it meant going to jail.

It’s different for everyone.

Hitting bottom is a process an alcoholic (or any addict) goes through to lift their denial about their disease and/or addiction, and the physical and emotional damage it is doing to them and others in their lives. It is that light bulb moment when an addict realizes he or she has had enough. Enough of the misery they feel each morning they wake up. Enough of the broken promises to themselves and others. Enough humiliation, enough remorse, enough dis-respect. It is the wake-up call many alcoholics and addicts need to go through to make them commit to ending the rampage created by their disease. It is time for help with alcoholism.

Where Exactly Is Bottom?

No one can really say where bottom is for any alcoholic or addict. In the 25 years of my active drinking, I hit numerous bottoms. I was fired from a job, arrested for DUI, suffered endless hangovers, landed in the ER twice from alcohol poisoning, was told by a therapist I needed to stop and by men they’d never marry someone ‘like me.’ So of course, I married another inebriate, who when I revealed I might be alcoholic convinced me I wasn’t, which allowed me to continue drinking for another 12 years.

“The premise of hitting bottom is that addicts hit one bottom and, when they get there, they are either struck sober or go running for the nearest treatment center. But addicts are resilient. They find people to rescue them. They often bounce along the bottom for years without a flicker of recognition that they need help. When they find themselves in a tough spot, alcohol whispers reassurances: There’s nothing to worry about as long as you have me,” says Interventionist Debra Jay in her book No More Letting Go.

When I first started attending A.A. meetings, I was shocked by some of the stories being told there. I couldn’t help think that most of the people I was listening to were worse off than me. Many talked about the ‘yets,’ in other words, all the things they hadn’t done when they drank but could have if they’d kept on going. After all, they hadn’t wrapped a car around a telephone pole yet, they hadn’t gotten raped from being drunk yet, they hadn’t beaten their wife yet.

The Sabotaged Mind

Dr. David Karol Gore, a substance abuse counselor from Atlanta, believes the disease of addiction is the only illness people can experience, while remaining oblivious to the fact they have a serious ailment requiring immediate attention. Simple logic says if you break your arm, you need medical treatment; the body and mind work together to make it obvious the limb won’t work properly until it’s treated. Alcoholism and alcohol addiction, on the other hand, works the opposite way; even as the physical symptoms manifest themselves, the disease sabotages the message between body and mind to keep the addict captive to the whims of the illness. Denial is the hallmark of addiction; complete negation of the problem or that there is a problem ‘yet’.

Sometimes, ‘yets’ can help people get and stay sober, but they can also keep an alcoholic in denial about their situation and in need of hitting what some call ‘rock bottom.’ A lose-everything-kind-of-place that no one wants to go, which for some, results in death.

The best thing to do is get help before any of this happens.

Things to remember about hitting bottom:

• For many alcoholics, it takes a life-altering event to admit you have a problem and seek help.
• Many alcoholics will stay in denial about their disease by saying that bad things haven’t happened yet.
• Hitting rock bottom is a lose-everything-kind-of-place no one wants to go. Get help before that happens.

Where Alcoholics Can Go For Help: 5 Tips

1. Take a self-assessment test for alcohol problems.

How can you tell if you have an alcohol problem? If you think you have a drinking problem, chances are you probably do. It might be helpful to take this self-test issued by the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence in order to identify possible alcoholism.

2. Seek out support groups.

If the test leans towards a problem, attending a 12-step meeting like A.A., SMART Recovery, or Rational Recovery may be good places to go next. Try a few different meetings before making a decision which one is best for you.

3. Seek one-on-one professional help.

Talking to a psychologist, therapist or counselor will also help you get the reason why some people are alcoholic. The American Psychological Association operates a “Find a Therapist” directory on their website. It’s a good place to start.

4. Look into treatment centers that treat alcoholism.

Many mental health clinics offer intensive outpatient programs, often referred to as IOPs, for those seeking help for alcohol and substance abuse. While residential rehab may work for some, other people find that a treatment center is the best option for them.

5. Make sure the family is treated.

And lastly, if someone’s else’s drinking troubles you, attending an Al-Anon meeting might be helpful. The CRAFT model for intervention, which requires family participation and training is also helpful.

Reach Out Now For Help

Remember that you are not alone! You can leave us a comment and we’ll get back with you as soon as we can. And if we can’t answer a specific question that you have, we can refer you to someone who can.

Reference Sources: Jay, Debra, No More Letting Go: The Spirituality of Taking Action Against Alcoholism and Drug Addiction, Bantam, 2006
Gore, Dr. David Karol, Hitting Bottom In Addiction: The Only Way To Go Is Down, Dr. Gore’s website.

Photo credit: coombesy

The Great Race: The First One To Finish Doesn’t Win
Recovery And Self-Care For The Long-Haul

By Paul J. Wolanin MA, CADC

The Marathon, Not The Sprint
Recovery from drug and alcohol addiction is a marathon, not a sprint.

Do you know how a sprinter trains for a race? They sprint! They focus on getting to their goal – the finish line – as quickly as possible. They use all their physical and mental resources within seconds to achieve their goal.

If you’ve ever watched top-level sprinters on television, you can see the intensity in their faces. They are hell-bent on staying one stride ahead of whoever is next to them. Their muscles flex, veins pump with blood and their eyes are fixed ahead. They do not let up for a second. Why? Because tiny mistakes have giant consequences in a sprint race – there is very little margin for error.

Addiction Recovery Is Like A Marathon
What about running a marathon? Have you ever watched one? That’s hard to do. A marathon is typically 26.2 miles and it would difficult to watch every single runner during the entire race.

First of all, the marathon course covers an enormous amount of ground. Secondly, there are usually dozens – if not hundreds or thousands – of people involved. Keeping up with every single one of them would be next to impossible.

What’s interesting about marathon runners is how in tune with their own abilities. Like staying on track in addiction recovery, they are:

• They know their strengths and weaknesses.
• They know how to pace themselves in order to conserve energy.
• They set small goals along the way.
• They do not focus on beating the person next to them.
• They are masters of their own minds and bodies and know without doubt that the mind controls the body.
• Most have mastered the “inner game” of distance running – they understand that failure happens in the mind first and in the body second.
• Marathon runners know that they can only be as good as the food they use to fuel their bodies.
• They have a level of dedication unlike most “common” runners. Marathoners may train for months on end for a single race.

Long Term Recovery: Is There A Finish Line?
I love the concept of distance running. It parallels addiction recovery in so many ways. Though I’ve never personally ran a marathon, I have several close friends that do so often. What’s so cool about a marathon is the idea of progress.

A sprinter can see the finish line. They can visually lock their eyes on their goal and give every ounce of their energy towards crossing the finish line first. It’s an all-out, no holds barred battle to get across that line.

A marathon runner can’t see the finish line. They cannot even see the entire course. They must constantly monitor their heart rate, breathing, hydration levels and pay attention to what their bodies are telling them. They have to deal with many variables and make adjustments along the way. I’ve been told that it takes great amounts of self-restraint to conserve energy when the body just wants to GO. The marathoner is a master of pacing and diligence.

Pacing And Diligence In Your Own Addiction Recovery

There is hope for treating drug addiction. These concepts of pacing and diligence apply directly to recovery and self-improvement. In fact, these two little words can have a dramatic impact on how you see success, failure and goal setting.

Let’s think of pacing as: “steady and consistent effort.” And diligence as: “careful and persistent work.”

Think about this and fill in the blanks as an exercise:

EXERCISE: What Are Some Long-Term Goals You Have?

• For your recovery
• For your health
• Financially
• For your relationships
• With work
• For your spiritual life
• For your emotional well-being
• For leisure
• Other________________________

1. What areas of your life could you adjust to start working towards these goals?
2. What kinds of activities are you are most likely to procrastinate about?
3. What are the things that take priority in your life today? (Remember that what is truly important to someone is demonstrated through action).
4. What kinds of excuses have you used to avoid working on your goals?
5. What would your life be like if you DID NOT begin to work towards these goals?
6. Would COULD your life be like if you DID begin to work on these goals (using pacing and diligence)?

You Can’t Rush Quality
The concepts of pacing and diligence apply to everything in life. My Grandfather used to tell me “Son, you can’t rush quality!” and boy was he right! Good things in life take time to accomplish. Things that come too quickly or easily never last.

A great illustration of pacing and diligence is the 12-step program. I know that I will never reach my goal of being recovered – I can just keep making good choices; working the steps each and every day and trusting God. The longer I am in recovery, the better my life gets. The closer I become to God, the more I depend on Him to provide what I need. The less time I spend focusing on problems the fewer problems I have. I learned all of this through 12-step programs. I learned to be patient and to not pray for what I WANT, but for what GOD WANTS FOR ME.

All this took and still takes lots of time. I’m cool with that. I’ve learned that things will happen in my life when I am prepared for them to happen. Not before or after. Just when the time is right.

Put It All Into Perspective
I make progress. Sometimes it feels like I’m standing still because the speed of my progress does not fit my own expectations. This is when the marathon of life becomes a sprint and things start to go wrong. When I start sprinting instead of pacing myself I run out of steam. I get frustrated and make mistakes. My life becomes unbalanced.
I must remember to slow down and remember that pacing and diligence are the things that will bring me (hopefully) to where I am meant to be. This does not mean I do not have goals – I have many. I hope that you do, as well.

Take some time and review the questions in this article. If you’re feeling really adventurous, take out a pen and paper and answer the questions like you would in a journal. Be as thorough as you would like to be. A great way to open up the mind is to journal without borders (meaning that you are not stopping to re-read what you’ve written, checking for spelling errors, etc. YOU JUST WRITE). And check out these other tips and tricks for addiction recovery.

For now, just begin.

To be continued.

Photo credit: Steven Depolo

Are You Ready To Face A Cocaine Habit?

Many people do not realize that cocaine is a highly addictive drug that directly targets the central nervous system. Cocaine’s addiction liability is one of the reasons that it has been scheduled as a narcotic, illegal drug in the U.S. And  people who use cocaine frequently are at seriously high risk of physical and psychological dependence.

So, how do you stop using cocaine? Can you just quit on your own? What happens once you stop taking cocaine? Find out what to expect after you stop a cocaine habit and how to safely do so here. Then, we invite your questions and comments about quitting cocaine at the end.

Can I Just Stop Taking Cocaine?

It depends.

In general, it is advisable to consult a medical professional before quitting cocaine. There are many factors involved when deciding on a course for cessation, the major one being your level of dependence and/or addiction. If you are highly addicted to cocaine, the answer to this question would be, “No,” as severe cravings are very likely to occur. Heavy users find it difficult to just stop, as they battle the strong urge to use to relieve the symptoms.

If you are an occasional user, it might be more likely that you can just stop taking cocaine, however, keep in mind that you will need to modify behaviors and be aware of triggers in order to avoid future use. So how should you get off cocaine? Let’s first explore what happens in the brain and body after you quit using cocaine.

What Happens When You Stop Taking Cocaine?

If you’ve been taking cocaine for a longer period of time, chances are that your body has gotten used to its presence and will protest when you stop. Why?  Cocaine works on the brain as a stimulant and causes the body to over-produce depressant effects in order to balance out. So once you stop using cocaine, these effects become noticeable. And when cocaine is no longer in the system, the central nervous system’s adapted functions only gradually normalize over time.

During the period when cocaine starts to exit the body – also known as withdrawal – you can expect to experience a set of symptoms commonly referred to a withdrawal symptoms. After a period of regular use, the body needs time to “figure out” how to regain homeostasis. So, when you stop taking cocaine… symptoms follow.

Side Effects When You Stop Taking Cocaine

Getting off cocaine is a good thing, a great decision!,  but it comes with a set of adverse side effects. The common side effects that occur when you quit taking cocaine can include:

• depression
• disturbed sleeping
• fatigue
• feeling agitated
• increased appetite
• slowing down of activity

Even though the effects are not physically tormenting, they should not be underestimated since they can still cause cravings and provoke relapse. This is why experts strongly recommended you consider emotional-psychological support during the first week or so of quitting cocaine until the side effects wear off.

Stop Taking Cocaine Suddenly

Suddenly stopping cocaine is certainly not pleasant for your body or mental health. In fact, this method can increase the likelihood of relapse, as side effects can be more severe and intense. Instead, get your body physically and mentally ready to cope with the absence of cocaine by means of slowly tappering down your dose. However, there are some cases when quitting cocaine cold turkey may be best.

Stop Taking Cocaine Cold Turkey

Heavy users may want to consider a cold turkey cocaine detox if there are not other viable options available for a controlled taper. However, going cold turkey off cocaine can provoke the so-called “crash period,” which is manifested by accompanied by a strong craving for more cocaine. When severe cravings occur, people often reach for other abusive substances or can even consider extreme ideas like suicide. This is why medical supervision is crucial during cocaine detox.

How Do I Stop Taking Cocaine?

Consult a medical professional such as a medical doctor, psychiatrist, or an addiction therapist (licensed psychologist) before you try to quit cocaine. While it is possible to quit without professional assistance, doing it on your own isn’t recommended, as it can be dangerous due to unstable mental health issues. A doctor can determine if a treatment facility may be best for you, or not, and will advise you on how to address withdrawal symptoms and be most comfortable during the process.

How To Stop Taking Cocaine Safely

Simply, the best way to stop taking cocaine safely is to seek medical assistance. Medical and mental health professionals can help you determine what is the safest way for your individual case, as all cases are unique and depend on a number of factors such as:

• age
• co-occuring disorders
• general health
• gender
• medical history
• level of dependence

If you are determined to quit cocaine on your own, stay surrounded by close and positive people. And seek help though support groups, psychotherapy, and/or people who your trust.

How To Stop Taking Crack Questions

In this article, we tried to cover the most common ways people quit cocaine and deal with the associated withdrawal symptoms. If you have additional questions about how to stop taking cocaine, feel free to ask us in the comments section below. We will try to respond to you personally and promptly.

Reference Sources: NIH: Drug Facts on Cocaine 
Medline Plus: Cocaine withdrawal

Photo credit: Nemo

By: Maggie Harmon

Supporting Addiction Recovery (And Yourself)!

When a loved one suffers from untreated alcoholism or addiction we often think, “If only they got treatment; if only they got some recovery then everything would be fine.” We imagine that the big problem is the drinking or the drug use and if that went away then all of the other problems would go too.

So what do we do (as the loved one of the addict) when that person does finally get into treatment and starts on their journey of recovery? How do we support them in the experience they are having and at the same time remember to accept the reality of whatever their recovery might look like without getting caught up in hope, expectations, and desires that they may not be able to deliver on? Like everything connected to addiction it’s complicated!

The Early Stages Of Recovery

In the early stages of addiction recovery the individual may be experiencing a host of physical, emotional and psychological distress. They are finally coming to a place of acknowledging that they have a problem and are likely intensely focused on looking at their own experience. This can be both a relief for those around them and at the same time can bring up a lot of anger and frustration. After all it has been their substance abuse that has created or contributed to all kinds of problems and challenges. It is easy to feel intense anger at someone who all of a sudden is ready to get better, but can’t make better all the days, months or years of hurt.

We want to help our formerly addicted loved one, but we also need them to see us, to see what they have “done,” to acknowledge the impact of their substance use and after waiting for recovery it can be very difficult to wait longer for that individual to come to a place of seeing or understanding our pain. The hard truth is that sometimes that never happens.

A Plan To Stay Sane

So how can you help someone who is newly in recovery and keep yourself sane, serene and cared for at the same time?

1. Let go of ownership.

Remember that their recovery belongs to them. You didn’t cause the addiction/alcoholism, you could not control their use, and you cannot cure it either. Getting well belongs to the individual, don’t try to do it for them!

2. Be supportive, not controlling.

It’s okay to let them know that you are happy or excited or hopeful about the recovery; it’s great if you want to offer support – being open to listening, giving them a ride to a meeting, making plans that are an alternative to the old patterns. But be careful and check-in with yourself to make sure that an offer to help doesn’t become a requirement to do something a certain way and an attempt to control. You might ask, “do you want me to drive you,” but stay away from, “I’ll drive you everyday (to make sure you go!).”

3. Have boundaries.  

Know what is or is not acceptable to you in your loved one’s progress. This is important to not only take care of yourself but also to keep you away from trying to control how or what they are doing. This might mean that you have a back up plan in case their recovery doesn’t work out, or it might just mean that you let them know what you can or cannot change even as they change. Remembering that you matter, and that your needs are something that only you can manage will help to keep you away from focusing entirely on your loved one and their behavior.

Addiction Recovery Is The Beginning

Living with and/or loving someone with a substance abuse problem can be devastating in so many ways; but what is incredibly upsetting to learn is that recovery alone does not solve all of those problems. In fact it can often create new problems, or reveal challenges that we always blamed on the alcohol or drugs but was really something independent. Recovery is about exploring a new path and a new way of living, for everyone involved, and making sure that you are paying attention to your own experience, even while you are caring about your loved one can be one of the best ways forward.

Photo credit: Ali Moradi